When I first heard "marriage isn't supposed to make you happy, it is to make you Holy" I will admit that I was a little put off, to say the least. I remember wrestling with God about that, I wanted to be happy, I want to have a happy marriage. Well, let me tell you, don't be put off in knowing that marriage will make you holy, rejoice in it.
When we got married, it was quite a transition for me. Everyone deals with the early stages of marriage differently. The biggest adjustment for me was in the finance department. My entire life my parents have supported me, I'm very blessed in that way. Going for a Panera or Starbucks run was no big issue, and I took so much for granted. When Michael and I got married, I was unemployed, so finances were tight. I only work part-time, so we aren't "rolling in the dough" by any means, but I am grateful for the little money that I can contribute. Michael and I have had countless conversations where he has expressed feeling guilty or sad because he couldn't give me something that I wanted. At first, living without my wants was a struggle but God wrecked my heart and put it back together in a way that only He can. I felt guilty for making my husband feel like he wasn't enough, and I felt guilty for putting my Heavenly Father aside for what the world could offer.
"Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in Heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Matthew 6:19-21
Through my husband, God changed me. I used to put so much of my worth in the items that I owned, the new shoes I had, my new wallet, the latest Lilly dress. Not that I don't still enjoy these lovely gifts, but they don't identify me. When I really learned what things cost, I glanced around my closet and jewelry collection and wanted to cry. Is what I have extensive? No. But is what I have excessive? Absolutely. I felt so convicted for my possessions, especially when there are so many that are less fortunate than I. Regardless of others, I realized what I wretch I had been, what a materialistic and selfish person.
"A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches, and favor is better than silver or gold."
Proverbs 22:1
If you follow me on Instagram (laurelrhyne) I'll be posting a few verses as well as a few thoughts as I go through a study of The Word on how we can find more of our identify in The Lord, and less in the world. Follow along!
Xx,
LG
Oh my goodness! Love love love! Ah, Laurel we should have coffee sometime (cheap coffee because we're financially responsible newlyweds). I can SO relate to this. The biggest thing that has convicted me without Jon having to say A WORD is how he is blessed financially and how he gives so much of what he has away to the mission of Christ and rarely buys himself anything. To see the freedom and joy God gives in dying to ourselves for His glory is a-mazing. Also, it is super confronting to read verses on not being of the world and being materialistic, and know in our hearts how easily we fall in to the traps of desiring these ridiculously earthly things. Also, to consider how ourselves having those things influences others sisters in Christ, causing them to stumble as well. It is major confronting. I'm so glad you posted this, and glad God is convicting you of the same. Love!<3
ReplyDeleteBabe, this is so heartfelt and honest - love it because it is true. Even though I'm not married yet, I'm blessed reading your journey + growth and seeing you trust in Jesus more because of it. Xo, K
ReplyDeletewww.katherinecourture.blogspot.com
"No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money." --Matthew 6:24
ReplyDeleteThis one has really convicted me the past few weeks.